A Letter of Gratitude

How do we experience gratitude?  Do we feel it?  Do we express it beyond a generic ‘thank you’.  Do we truly experience it and savor such times/events/people?

Gratitude can bring much richness to our lives.  It is an antidote to depression, negativity, the half-empty glass mind-set.  When we bring to mind what we’re grateful for, we experience positive feelings.  Writing them down can sink them into our being even more and elicits those good emotions.

All too often we take note of the negatives and openly express our criticisms; and the positives fall upon those taken-for-granted silences.  It seems like we have to work harder at focusing on what we’re grateful for and work our minds in that direction.   And so some exercises have been developed from the field of positive psychology to enhance and strengthen our appreciation muscle.  One such exercise is a  letter of gratitude, where we write the specifics of our appreciation to someone who has impacted our life in a positive way.  It’s a two-way win of highly charged positive endorphins here.  The writer re-experiences those warm and good feelings as she puts the thoughts and feelings on paper; and the recipient feels great significance knowing how she effected and impacted another person.

It is best to share the letter with the person, preferably in person or at least by mail or on the phone.

Perhaps you will write your letter of gratitude to someone.  Here is mine:

 

Dear B,

This is long overdue.  But as long as we’re still on this earth together it’s not too late for you to know how thankful I continue to feel for all that you did for Nava and us during our year of her medical crisis.  You are forever a role-model in how to be selflessly giving and initiating in good deeds (mitzvahs).  You appeared constantly throughout the year as if an angel from heaven had descended upon us.

You came numerous times each week at night after your long work days to visit Navi as she lay in a coma in the PICU of LIJ hospital for almost 3 months.  You brought us all goodies; I specifically remember those yummy and colorful bakery cookies.  You polished Navi’s toenails as her legs lay stiffly encased in those blow-up things to keep the blood circulating.   You did what no one else did.  You were there for us all like nobody else was.

When Navi was moved up to Blythedale rehab hospital, the long drive didn’t deter you.  You came up there as well to visit her and give her encouragement.

This brings me back to that time 11 years ago and I feel ‘faklempted’ writing this, but the most unbelievable act of supreme awesomeness was when you and your entire family came to the rehab {when I was away in Israel for the week when Esti gave birth} to celebrate Purim with Navi.  But you didn’t just come up to hang out with her.  You brought up and set up a feast – decorations, tablecloths and food galore like a caterer- and you all had your Purim feast in a rehab hospital with my daughter.  I obviously wasn’t there to witness this but it continues to be spoken about by my 95 year old mother whose mind isn’t as great as it used to be, but this she remembers to a tee.

Family members didn’t do this but you did.  I could never adequately express my gratitude for such deeds.  I can’t step up to your plate but I carry it around within me – this golden plate upon which service, kindness and sheer goodness sits as if on a throne.  You are my inspiration to do good to others; to initiate and not wait to be asked; to seek out opportunities to do good. You are forever embedded in my heart and soul.

Love,

Harriet

 

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”  William Arthur Ward

 

“When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.”  Gilbert K. Chesterton

 

Thanks for stopping by.  How do you practice gratitude?  As you bring it into your life more, you will feel better, lighter and happier.