Does Your Past Create Your Present?

How hooked in are we to the blame game?

When do we begin to take responsibility for our lives?

When do we realize that our past may explain certain things but it does not have to continue creating a life we don’t like?

Can we de-tangle from our past and work towards a better present and future?

It’s certainly not easy but it is doable.  And it starts with the attitude of, “I am not a prisoner of my past.  I am not locked into the same step patterns.  I can create new ones.  But, I must first understand it, come to some terms with it and then begin to learn and take on new steps.”

As Katie Hafner said in her interview, “What parts of it you’re off the hook because it was beyond your control and what parts you have a say in..”

We’re off the hook for much of what happened in our childhood since we didn’t have the power then to do much about how we were raised.  But we have a say in the Now.

Now as grown-ups we have the power.  And the power is in the choice, in the choices we continuously make.

If we are unaware and simply proceed along without reflection, we tend to repeat the same patterns.  As Ms. Hafner called it, “multi-generational trauma” where the patterns we don’t like continue and get passed on down to the next generation, unless someone breaks the cycle.

We break the cycle by deciding, by making a choice to do things differently.  But of course we must believe that change is possible.   And then we either seek out help or work on ourselves on our own.  Either way work is entailed.   Some avoid this work at all costs and maintain a victim role.  And some decide that they can make a new present and future for themselves.

We all have stuff that we hold onto and assign blame for, why it can’t be different or why I can’t be different.

The more we examine and work through, the more we’ll own our life and realize there are numerous ways of responding to circumstances and building the life we want.

 

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Maria Robinson

Where are you?

I’m happy you stopped by.  Share, comment, let me know you’re here and getting some take-away.