Honoring the Miracle of My Daughter’s Life By Seizing Life Now

I’ve always been a seizer, of opportunities that is.  However, since 2002, I’ve become a mindful and intentional seizer.

In July 2002 my middle daughter,Nava, miraculously alive and basically recovered, walked out of her rehab hospital after a year-long medical crisis.

I felt a strong need to honor her miraculous survival and recovery.  And so for the next few years I struggled with the what and how – what to do and how to live differently having witnessed this most incredible miracle.  People grow and change out of their pain; I needed to create something new and different from the awesomeness of watching a life be returned from near death and be literally rebuilt limb by limb, muscle by muscle, function by function.

There was no going back to life as before, although in concrete ways, that’s exactly what I did, what we all did.  There lied my immense angst and frustration.  It didn’t seem right to just ‘resume’ .  We had all been through something huge, and hugely defining.  There was a tugging force screaming out to do something with this miracle I was blessed with.

To date, I haven’t Done That Something.  I haven’t started an organization or foundation or created that something out of nothing.  But now, 10 years later, I recognize that I am living with more intention, fervor and passion; I am actively engaged in the familiar but more so, seeking out the new and unknown.  I feel I’m living better than Before.    You could say I have taken life on with a vengeance.

My ‘seizing moments’ have come about by living intentionally with two basic principles as my guiding forces:

Finding ways ‘to do’ and stepping outside my comfort zone.

I live with these mottos.

Finding Ways To Do:    A ‘To Do’ mindset affords us wonderful opportunities.  It’s up to us to bring into our lives what we want and what we choose to go after.   And it’s not about getting it all; it’s about incorporating bits and pieces into our lives now.   Voltaire says, “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.”    We need not wait for that perfect time.  For it may never come.

It’s always easier to find ways Not To Do.  They’re called excuses-  the easy ways out.  And they’re easy nails on which to hang our hats.   That is where our hats will stay, hung up on the status quo, remaining in place.  Is that how we want to live, passively in place?   Not me, said I.  I look for ways To Do, and I do it now.  For I know all too well how our lives truly hang by the thinnest of threads.  As the saying goes, if not now, when.

{Full quote: If I am not for myself, then who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, then what am I? And if not now, when?”   Rabbi Hillel (Hillel the Elder (c. 60 BC-10 AD)  Jewish scholar and religious leader.}

Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone:    But comfort feels good.  Why step out of it?  Because therein lies the opportunities…. to engage in the new, to grow, to learn, to experience, to achieve, and yes, to risk.  But the new, the risks are scary.  Yes, fear is a powerful force.  We fear the unknown; we fear failure, rejection, loss.    If we give in to this fear, we sabotage our pursuits, dreams, goals and appealing chances.

How about pushing through the fear and making it our friend by saying, “I’m scared and I’m doing it anyway.”    As  Neale Walsh says,  “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”  New opportunities and experiences await us.   So much is out there for us to partake in.  Go for your interests.  Seek out and ye shall find… a wide world out there, open to us.  Are we open to it??

{Some of my} Seizable moments:

Winter walks along the beach.    Excuses not to – it’s too cold, too windy, too empty, who goes to the beach in the winter……

To Do – winter walks are gorgeous, not many people ( I wonder why, they must be the Not To Do people), quiet and peaceful, bundling up to the cold ocean air, thoroughly refreshing and mind-clearing.

Times Square on New Year’s Eve.    Excuses no to – too cold, too crowded, too crazy,  I’d rather watch it on TV, that’s for tourists…..

To Do – exciting to walk in the city with all the excitement in the air, organized crowds, fun and friendly people, spontaneously ending up in Central Park at the bandstand for a free dancing party, fun ride home on the railroad.

Into the city for a course/lecture/event.  Excuses not to – too tired, too far, too lazy,  too, too…

To Do – interesting event, uplifting, stimulating, learn new things, meet interesting people, engage in good conversation.

[Some of my] Stepping out of my comfort zone seizable opportunities:

I started going on nature walks as a reprieve from my 15 hour days by Nava’s bedside when she  was in the rehab hospital.  I will soon be going on my third Swiss Alp hike.  I became a hiker- a mid-life new love.

I now do lots of public presentations;  something if you would’ve told me 10 years ago I’d be doing, I would’ve looked at you like you were nuts and said, ‘I don’t do public speaking; not me, I’m too shy, too scared, too……  I can now say I not only do them but I truly enjoy them.  I love the interaction and find them very stimulating and empowering.   I have found my voice.

Computers ‘scare’ me as I am not very techy.  I learn slowly as I go and enlist lots of helpers.   I’ve recently embarked on my newest techy endeavor – teleconference parenting classes.

Over the past 10 years, I have built the story of my life in the light of the miracle of Nava.  It is a shining force that guides me towards initiating and proactively seeking out wonderful and meaningful  opportunities.  When I string all of these together, the chain is big, the light is bright and the awesomeness of life is being honored.

I would love for you to share some of your ‘seizable’ moments.   Do you have any mottos that guide you towards living well?

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