Coping, Au Natural

“Let me write out a prescription for something to help you get through the next few months.  If she survives, it’s going to be a long haul.”  This was said by one of the ICU doctor’s when my middle daughter, Nava, had a medical crisis that landed her in a drug-induced coma and on a ventilator.

“No thank you”, I said, as my husband nudged me to at least take the prescription.   “I will attempt this the natural way.”  I rarely take a tylenol;  I was not going to start taking anti-anxiety pills.

I realized I needed to stay physically healthy and psychologically strong so that I could cope with this larger-than-life ordeal and be there for my daughter.   I quickly decided to resume what I had been doing for the past few years – walking.

And so I began my walking regimen, or I should say, my walking therapy.

Every morning before going to the hospital to begin my day’s vigil by my daughter’s bedside, I went to my neighborhood high school track and briskly walked at least 8 laps (2 miles).  No headphones to distract me; my thoughts and prayers kept me going around and around.

I focused on the large open grassy space, the one big beautiful green tree in my path and the sky, be it crystal clear or beautifully clouded.  I held onto those images.  I listened to my pain and heard it clearly.  I spoke to it.  I desperately needed the strength to go through this horrific pain each and every day.

Summer turned to fall and I walked among the fallen leaves on the path.  My big tree turned even more gorgeous as its leaves became vibrantly orange and golden.  My self-talk continued.  My plea was for the strength to carry on.

Fall succumbed to winter when Nava was moved to a rehab facility in Westchester.  I continued my walking up there through the streets of the local neighborhood.   Bundled up, I walked for an hour, to the amazement of some of the school bus drivers who sometimes saw me and offered me a ride back.   I declined.

Walking was my charger and I had needed my daily recharging.

I had set my sights on a nature trail that I came upon one day when driving around the area.  So when the crocuses popped their heads up along the path of the rehab hospital, I decided it was time to venture out and spend my ‘free’ hour walking along this path, watching spring arise.

Walking was clearly my daily dose of medicine.  I can count on two hands how many days I missed in 10 months.  And I only missed one day with Nava because of being slightly under the weather.

This became my pill-free way of dealing with the most difficult time in my life;  when I needed to be in as good a shape as possible to be at Nava’s side, assisting her every step of the way.

Tips for a natural approach to coping with hardship and feelings of pain:

• Find a natural stress buster that appeals to you:  walking, exercise, meditation,  breathing exercises,  yoga,  swimming, biking, to name a few.
• Do it,  and then make it part of your daily routine.
• Focus on the activity.  For that short time, really hone in on what you’re doing.  It helps you feel grounded.
• Listen to your voice of pain and sadness. Talk to yourself.  Let it be O.K.
• Ask for what you want.  Pray to whom or whatever.

What is your natural way of dealing with hard times/circumstances?

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