Harriet Cabelly, LCSW
Therapist . Speaker . Author
In conducting parenting workshops on communication skills with our children, I emphasize the soulful and emotional aspects in raising our kids. Depositing into their little souls the ‘I can do’ attitude, encouraging the expression of their dreams (despite our thinking they might be unrealistic) and cultivating the seedling to sprout into its own unique species of a flower, is all so vital in raising children with a strong sense of self who are competent, confident and have a high EQ (emotional intelligence).
As we know, EQ can point to a happier and more satisfying life than IQ. But I’m not here to talk about EQ vs IQ.
In doing these workshops, it’s dawned on me that if we as children didn’t get all this good emotional input, how can we develop it and give it to ourselves as adults? And yes, I’m taking the leap to say, we Can still attain it. We are not a prisoner of our past.
If our dreams were crushed or squelched, we can bring them forth and work to carry them out.
We can feed ourselves positive messages.
We can start to believe in ourselves.
We can take pride in our efforts and accomplishments.
We can praise ourselves.
We can take small steps towards a goal and encourage ourselves each step of the way.
We can revel in our successes, however small they may be. They are the stepping stones to continue on towards further success.
We can respect our own struggles and give ourselves time and patience as we stumble along during a difficult time or situation.
We can allow ourselves our feelings – the ‘nasty’ feeling ones too.
We can develop an ‘I can’ attitude.
We can become risk-takers and engage in new endeavors.
We can learn new things as we continue to expand ourselves.
We can fill ourselves with gratitude and appreciation for all we are and have.
We can develop more compassion as we open our eyes to all that’s around us and work more in the service of others.
We can be our very own coach and friend.
We can take care of ourselves; nurture ourselves and feed ourselves positive statements of all that we want to do, become, and reach for.
There is so much out there to be utilized and engaged in; there is so much of ourselves that is under-utilized and under-maximized. Let’s bring the two together for an exciting journey.
Thanks for reading. Sharing is appreciated as is Comments.
Thank you for this Harriet, I felt good just reading this. I try very hard to have a positive attitude but a reminder is good.
I really enjoyed this piece, I felt like you were looking at me with those lovely, kind eyes and talking to me.xxx
Hi Shazia,
Nice to ‘see’ you here. You are a very upbeat and positive person. This is preaching to the choir for you.
Thank you for your sweet words. Glad this piece ‘spoke’ to you.
Read any good books lately?
Harriet, This is exactly what I needed today!! Thank you so much. Lisa
Hi Lisa,
Nice to ‘see’ you here. You’re the parent from the How To Talk workshop, right?
Glad this resonated for you. And glad you commented.
This is lovely Harriett. It seems to me that in nurturing ourselves, we are also nurturing our world. It’s all consciousness. 🙂
Encourage one another.
Elle
Hi Elle,
I like that- when we nurture ourselves, we also nurture the world. Yes, then the good feelings spread outward. We fill our well, then we have that much more to give.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
Harriett,
Awesome message today. You reminded me of the power that resides within those two simple words — “I can…” I loved it. Thank you! Have a great week!
-Victor
Hi Victor,
Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Glad you like the message. Yes, ‘I can’ is very powerful. When we believe, we do. And what we believe we can, we do, and of course vice versa.
Funny, this post is timely for me. Your statement about how we can allow ourselves our feelings… Just earlier today, I had regretted a feeling and then quickly thought about the “regret”of that feeling. What I found was this: as i allowed myself the feeling to come up within me, I discovered the benefit of being able to process through the “regret”… and from this I had gained deeper insight into who I am, my relationship with others, and my growing ability to “let things go”. Thank you for sharing, Harriet 🙂
Hi Ajen,
Thanks for commenting. The idea of ‘letting things go’ is a hard one for me. I am aware of it and consciously work at it often. I think simply allowing ourselves to feel those uncomfortable feelings, be it regret, or anything else, is pretty powerful. And not running away from them or pushing them down as shameful can help in the shift.
Thank you again for stopping by and sharing your insight.